Thank you for sharing & I very much appreciate your efforts to engage & understand. Relationships, no matter the type, are incredibly complex & require effort, consideration, empathy, & compromise from all involved parties. All relationships must have a foundation constructed of: honesty, communication, trust, & respect.
Where so many of us fall short, irrespective of gender or gender identity, is that we succumb to the very human temptation to speak in generalities &/or paint in broad strokes. In a large number of the responses I read - yes, I have read the preponderance of the responses - there is a proclivity to assert "all men do..." or "all men do not..." or "all women do..." or "all women do not...". This approach ignores the variety, depth & complexity of human emotions & how humans socialize, even integrate with one another.
I am sure there is a lengthy list of very valid "why's" behind the excessive & detrimental use of broad generalizations. But, I think all of us, myself included, would fare better & feel better about & more confident in our relationships if we consciously chose to diminish our tendency to grasp at generalizations.
I strongly suspect that the relative ease of generalization vs the effort & complexity to do this on very individual, case x case, basis plays a substantial role. Another suspicion is that these generalizations partially or completely abrogate us from including our own foibles & shortcomings into the analysis - easier & more comfortable to foist culpability onto others than it is to embrace & learn our own contributions to failed relationships.